About Me
About Meuncle jerry finances 60 hoes
of course!! wait... wtf?? who's jerry? it's a mnemonic device... I was on the road... and I was behind this car. w/ 4 people... one person was in the rear driver side seat... she was a righty.. so she would reach over her head stick her hand out the window and tap the ashes out the car... so I try to drive to the right a bit to try to avoid the ashes... and I see the driver get rid of a cigarette... a min later... the front passenger starts to put ashes out the window.... all I have to say is... don't buy that car... it'll WREAK!!!
Mood: I have no idea why people smoke..
it's a long time coming...
3 weeks to be more precise... that's when it was made official that porccu and I made it official that we're dating... it's funny... the friday before... I had dinner w/ my father & his friend... he said "w/ working at the state & UR dad's leaves U sunday... not much time to date huh?" nope, don't have much time... the past few weeks. I'd go to nyc. it's about 2 hrs each way. it's insane if I went and came back in one day... so after work I shower and get ready really quick and then go, stay over and come home the next day... it's a PITA but it's totally worth it that moment I hug her... everyone in my life are happy for me... I think my sister is the most happy hearing the news... she was telling me.. "it's good to date... it took a while for you..." at the same time tho... it's not the greatest idea to rush into a relationship... no matter how small... you need to have time to fully heal... I talk to my ex every now and then... there was a 5 month freeze b/c she broke the rules I setup for us... but anyway... she's still hung up on me... her b/f now forbids her to talk to me... or mention me... b/c she'll start to cry... for a while.. the mention of her.. it hurts... then for a while anger/rage... now... nothing... if anything... pity... and the "I told U so" feeling for not listening to the advice I told her tons of times... I'm at that point like my cousin... I told U plenty of times... now I'll just shut up... and have U fall flat on UR face... and I'll be there to point and laugh at the pieces...
Mood: the beginning stages of a relationship... so lots of happy happy joy joy feelings.
can't live w/ them... can't afford a house w/o them...
well I have to go and cook dinner for my father... he works really hard to provide for us.. sacrificing a lot... now as I get older I appreciate what he did for us... and a lot of his qualities rubbed off on me... which is a good thing... but somehow I'll still whine and complain cooking for him.. I'm a little tired from working... I don't have a blue collar job like him... but for some reason w/ my job I'm stressed and tired... more and more projects are put on my shoulders... I kind of like it... I love that sense of... wtf?? how am I going to do that??and being able to do something and put together something from nothing. recently the job has gotten kind of mundane.. there's also the impending doom of possibly losing my job... and the upshot that no matter how hard I work... no matter how many good things people say about me... it doesn't mean squat... since the factors of the layoffs are how many years U work there and what position U have... and you wonder why the state is in a deficit...
yes the house.. I'm still waiting for the mortgage to be accepted... once it is... I'll have a closing date and then I can move... start fresh... I kind of have a nomadic feel though... I always have a craving to move out after a year or 2...
the best thing going for me right now is porccu who has been on my mind a lot... I get to see her this weekend :D
Mood: can't sit still... want to see porccu!!
screw it
the lack of updates well... I kno that some parties read my blog every now and then... I've been hesitant to write about some major life changes. why should I hold something back? it's disturbing that after all this time my personal life would effect someone that I've moved on from. the past 2 months have been pretty eventful.
last month, started the process to buy a house. yes, I might lose my job soon with the talk of cutting thousands of jobs across the state. sadly it doesn't matter how important you are to others, what matters is how long you've worked and what position you are at. I have backup plans either way... "only when U've lost everything are you free to do anything"
I forced myself to be alone. mostly to heal, also not to rush into anything... I find myself thinking of porccu, short for porcupine, throughout the day (as with all the nicknames I give people, it has a meaning). for the first time in a long time I'm happy.
Mood: poke poke
bi-polar whoes
I hate this time of year... I have allergies up the wazoo.. been having headaches all week long... at the same time tho... to help relieve my headaches I take claratin... but then again it's not a daily habit so it's not all that effective... I notice that I get REALLY depressed when I come off of it... so it's always a double edged sword... I get relief from my allergies... but then I get really depressed the day after the last time I take it...
Mood: happy... sad... happy... sad...