About Me
About Meanother loop
birthdays for me are kind of... meh... not much to get worked up about anymore. as I'm getting older I'm trying to be self sufficient... not to depend on anyone's charity... so this year that it came up again... it bothers me that people want to take me out... or treat me special... I'm happier just staying home on my couch under a blanket w/ my 2 girls of course one won't pay any attention to me... too busy licking her fur... just watching a movie/drama/button mashing... and making something good to eat... pretty much treating it like any normal day...
what is a birthday anyway?? it's the day you were born on however many years ago... even if you do have a number associated to your age?? that isn't any big indicator of your maturity level... similar to the fight club quote "you're not your job or how much money you have in your bank" it shouldn't limit you, define who you are... so what if I just finished my 29th trip around the sun... I don't look it... I don't feel it... I don't act like it... I am who I am and I'm happy!!
the most I want from most people in my life is to be told "happy birthday" only a select few I would want to REALLY share it with... and it's pretty much a normal day to me...
since my birthday does fall close to new years I've also reflected on my life in the years past... especially since high school... there's a HUGE difference... I'm glad all that b/s is done and over with... I was miserable back then... I don't remember much of it, I think my subconscious put a mental block on it so I wouldn't think about it anymore... at the same time... I'm glad I've had all those experiences... even tho some things made me laugh... some things made me cry... they made me who I am today... and since I'm happy with how things are now... I wouldn't change a thing... when I look into the future... I don't really see much... I'm not all that adventurous... I don't do a lot... but I do see me happy... of course the unexpected curveball here and there... but overall... I'm optimistic.
writer's block
there's a few things going on in my life... some things that bring me joy, pain, significance in my life... but I'm just staring at the box to type... I guess I'm just not in the mood...
Mood: eh...
a new beginning
the reason why I have so many friends on facebook is b/c well... some games need more players to be better... since I'm starting to get bored of them... I decided to delete a lot of them... a handful of them stayed... I did talk to some and continue to talk to them as well... but it's losing it's novelty... I'm working on the other projects I have on the back burner... I started a new one... it's for next halloween... but I need to learn how to make it first...
Mood: feeling the need for change
too smart for my own good
I did my database for my blog a long time ago, thinking about what COULD be in the future... now that I'm looking at it... I'm wondering how did I do it all?!?! when would I ever need that... and now it's sinking in... wow... I set it up really nice!!! it happens to me all the time... especially at work!!
but a lot of HOW to do it has kind of left me... I haven't programmed my site in a while... lots of things to do... even though I started a new project for halloween next year... shouldn't be more than 20 bucks to buy... but HOURS to make...
Mood: I can't stand it when I'm wrong... even if it was me that was right at one point in time...
when the package is this pretty...
my battery died on my mp3 player when i was on the train last week, so i heard people's conversations. a hoochie mama was on a train counting her change w. her hoochie mama friend. I heard "silver dollar" i was thunking... how did she get a silver dollar? they're really rare to come by. and worth like 20 bucks!! most likely susan bs or the new silver color dollar coins. "omg george washington! i never knew the backs were different." I never missed my headphones more...
Mood: put more clothes on... and read a book!!!